The air was still filled with the smoke from the fireworks when social media, magazines, TV, you name it, started to shout to GO TO THE GYM, BECOME A NEW YOU, DO A POST-CHRISTMAS DETOX, GO VEGAN, RUN EVERY DAY, GIVE UP SUGAR/COFFEE/ALCOHOL!
Horrible, horrible, New Year’s noise. Who needs this kind of pressure and guilt-tripping when we’re all a little bit bloated and hung over and light-deprived? Who? I definitely don’t want do #veganjanuary or #dryjanuary. January is bad enough already.
January is about survival. The struggle with dark thoughts at this time of the year is real for me and now is not the time to beat myself up over the fact that it is. I have been around the block a few times by now and done a few Januaries – I know that this will pass eventually.
Until it does, I have to keep reminding myself to do the things that I know are good for me, even though my January thoughts and feelings are telling me to hide and hibernate and definitely not look people in the eye or engage in chit chat.
I keep exercising
I’m still running and going to Crossfit even though mind isn’t in a go-get-them-gainz mode and my body is sloooooow. On more than one occasion last week I’d finish a Crossfit workout, go outside to gasp for air and think “Geezus, I do THIS on a regular basis and I’m still fat!”
This too shall pass.
I keep eating my veg
The last thing I want to do when it’s miserable outside is eat heaps of cold vegetables. At the same time I lack the energy to roast them so to make sure that I still get my 5-a-day, I either chuck a bunch of spinach into a smoothie or drink a greens powder every day. I’ll eat vegetables properly again once it’s not January anymore. Until then – shortcuts.
I keep reading and listening to podcasts
Books and podcasts are amazing. They take your mind off to other places, they turn off that constant dialogue/debate/tantrum/pacifying/panicking that goes on in my brain.
I keep writing
Last week I was just going to publish the title of this blog post and nothing else. But then all of a sudden on Sunday night I felt a little lighter again and I wrote some words. Writing is good for me, whether it’s here or on social media. It tells my brain Jekyll that Hyde is not in charge. I know that I know who I am, and right now I know that it’s just January that’s telling me I’m fat and old and ugly and slow and weak and a bad person. It makes me feel yet a little bit more lighter when others respond and relate to my rambling or my tweets :)
May this be the year women stop doing exercise that they hate and find a way to move their body that makes them forget to obsess about what their body looks like, but fills them with joy about what their body can do and how great it feels to live in it.
— L.ina (@MrsB_LDN) January 6, 2018
Your body is not a temple. Its purpose is not to be looked at and admired. Your body is your home. Its purpose is to be functional. Take care of it, make it comfortable, enjoy living in it!
— L.ina (@MrsB_LDN) January 8, 2018
I keep believing in spring
At the end of the day I keep repeating to myself to not believe everything I think right now and that I am not my January thoughts.